MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT BLUES
I love my husband, he was just out of town for a few days and is home again. I missed him, but I have to tell ya, I sure did sleep!
Sigh.... dontcha just hate it when you're sleep deprived? Here I am, it's in the middle of the damn night ~ AGAIN ~ and I'm awake and sitting at my computer to pass the time......
Okay, here's the setting..... I'm snuggled in my cozy and oh-so-comfy bed, sleeping away and minding my own biz, and I am becoming vaguely aware that whatever it is I'm dreaming is slowly but surely getting interrupted, and I'm being transported from the Air Force Base in Ottawa where I lived as a kid, back to reality and the present, in my bed. Why?? Turns out it's NOT an F104 Starfighter Widowmaker military jet screamin' in my ears. It dawns on me that the racket I hear is my hubby, facing me, and snoring up a storm!
Okay, so incarcerate me, but it IS the middle of the night and I AM sleep stupored ~ but I realize that what I'd like to do is put my hands around his neck and squeeze. Lots. For a long while. Or stuff a pillow in his face and hold it there until I can't hear any more damn noise comin' outta him. Sigh...... but I remember that I am basically a good person, not to mention a law-abiding citizen, so instead I get out of bed mumbling obscenities under my breath (so as not to wake him, wouldn't wanna do THAT), go pee, sit my butt down at the computer, and have a smoke to "calm" me down. Feeling homicidal is a tiring business you know. So here I am in the wee hours, when house noises are spookier and more unexplainable, and I'm the only person in the universe who is conscious, aren't I??
Most people, if not all (what do I know, I'm not a specialist) snore as they get older, and we're both in our "middle" age now. I know I snore now too, but he says it's "softly" and not enough to wake him. He only notices if he's already awake. But HE snores like a bloody freight train most nights. The really shitty thing is that I have bouts of insomnia . Here's the kicker ~ this is what makes me go round the bend ~ why is it that I can sleep like the dead on the nights that he is snoring like a banshee, but on his more quiet nights (there are a few) I'm staring at the ceiling as if Sav is hanging around over my bed??? (for any of you non-Def Leppard lovers, Sav is their bass player and THE most gorgeous man in the world, bar none) Call me screwed up, call me a cab, but my little world of "going to bed at night" can sometimes be enough to make anyone a little wacky in the head. Or homicidal.
And I'm such a perverse little sleeper too. Sheeit, you'd think I was obsessive/compulsive. I read every night in bed before I go to sleep. I have to, it makes me sleepy. I started doing that decades ago because when I go to bed that's when my mind wants to go over the day, the next day, all my problems, everyone else's problems, and the world situation too. So, if I'm reading a good book, my eyes start to shut, I turn out the light and drift into sleep immediately, thinking about the story I'm reading instead of everything else. So what happens is.......... when I'm so rudely jarred awake from snoring or from "bed jumping" (that's another thing, why do some people flop around like a fish out of water in their sleep? WHAT IS THAT??) if I can't fall right back into la-la land, then I have to get up and....you guessed it !! ....... start all over again! What FUN in the middle of the night! **smiling with a grimace**
So I usually do what I'm doing now, sit at my computer. Normally I'll play a mindless game of Solitaire to numb my homicidal tendencies before I go back in there with him. He's innocently sleeping away, of course. And then when I go back to bed I have to read to get sleepy ~ again. Nuts, aren't I?? There have been nights when it's so noisy in there, and NOT the good kind, lol , that I have to do that 2 or 3 times before I can finally stay asleep. And a few when I never get to sleep at all until he gets out of bed for the day........sigh*
There's something to be said for sleeping alone. If you ain't sleeping, then it's your own damn fault. Oh lord, then instead of homicidal I'd be suicidal.
Okay we won't go there, that's just silly! I can say in all honesty though, that if I had the option of a spare room that I could stick another bed in, I'd have my bedroom to myself, and the "old guy" as I lovingly call him, would have his. Not an option in this house though, so instead I'll be up some nights, playing Solitaire on my computer or thinking up songs to write for Debs on the SA forum.
I love my husband, but I need my sleep. I'm just working out whether I want to loligag around in prison where there's no computers in the middle of the night though........... what to do, what to do.........? Aaaawwwww, maybe just one more game of Soitaire.......
Sigh.... dontcha just hate it when you're sleep deprived? Here I am, it's in the middle of the damn night ~ AGAIN ~ and I'm awake and sitting at my computer to pass the time......
Okay, here's the setting..... I'm snuggled in my cozy and oh-so-comfy bed, sleeping away and minding my own biz, and I am becoming vaguely aware that whatever it is I'm dreaming is slowly but surely getting interrupted, and I'm being transported from the Air Force Base in Ottawa where I lived as a kid, back to reality and the present, in my bed. Why?? Turns out it's NOT an F104 Starfighter Widowmaker military jet screamin' in my ears. It dawns on me that the racket I hear is my hubby, facing me, and snoring up a storm!
Okay, so incarcerate me, but it IS the middle of the night and I AM sleep stupored ~ but I realize that what I'd like to do is put my hands around his neck and squeeze. Lots. For a long while. Or stuff a pillow in his face and hold it there until I can't hear any more damn noise comin' outta him. Sigh...... but I remember that I am basically a good person, not to mention a law-abiding citizen, so instead I get out of bed mumbling obscenities under my breath (so as not to wake him, wouldn't wanna do THAT), go pee, sit my butt down at the computer, and have a smoke to "calm" me down. Feeling homicidal is a tiring business you know. So here I am in the wee hours, when house noises are spookier and more unexplainable, and I'm the only person in the universe who is conscious, aren't I??
Most people, if not all (what do I know, I'm not a specialist) snore as they get older, and we're both in our "middle" age now. I know I snore now too, but he says it's "softly" and not enough to wake him. He only notices if he's already awake. But HE snores like a bloody freight train most nights. The really shitty thing is that I have bouts of insomnia . Here's the kicker ~ this is what makes me go round the bend ~ why is it that I can sleep like the dead on the nights that he is snoring like a banshee, but on his more quiet nights (there are a few) I'm staring at the ceiling as if Sav is hanging around over my bed??? (for any of you non-Def Leppard lovers, Sav is their bass player and THE most gorgeous man in the world, bar none) Call me screwed up, call me a cab, but my little world of "going to bed at night" can sometimes be enough to make anyone a little wacky in the head. Or homicidal.
And I'm such a perverse little sleeper too. Sheeit, you'd think I was obsessive/compulsive. I read every night in bed before I go to sleep. I have to, it makes me sleepy. I started doing that decades ago because when I go to bed that's when my mind wants to go over the day, the next day, all my problems, everyone else's problems, and the world situation too. So, if I'm reading a good book, my eyes start to shut, I turn out the light and drift into sleep immediately, thinking about the story I'm reading instead of everything else. So what happens is.......... when I'm so rudely jarred awake from snoring or from "bed jumping" (that's another thing, why do some people flop around like a fish out of water in their sleep? WHAT IS THAT??) if I can't fall right back into la-la land, then I have to get up and....you guessed it !! ....... start all over again! What FUN in the middle of the night! **smiling with a grimace**
So I usually do what I'm doing now, sit at my computer. Normally I'll play a mindless game of Solitaire to numb my homicidal tendencies before I go back in there with him. He's innocently sleeping away, of course. And then when I go back to bed I have to read to get sleepy ~ again. Nuts, aren't I?? There have been nights when it's so noisy in there, and NOT the good kind, lol , that I have to do that 2 or 3 times before I can finally stay asleep. And a few when I never get to sleep at all until he gets out of bed for the day........sigh*
There's something to be said for sleeping alone. If you ain't sleeping, then it's your own damn fault. Oh lord, then instead of homicidal I'd be suicidal.
Okay we won't go there, that's just silly! I can say in all honesty though, that if I had the option of a spare room that I could stick another bed in, I'd have my bedroom to myself, and the "old guy" as I lovingly call him, would have his. Not an option in this house though, so instead I'll be up some nights, playing Solitaire on my computer or thinking up songs to write for Debs on the SA forum.
I love my husband, but I need my sleep. I'm just working out whether I want to loligag around in prison where there's no computers in the middle of the night though........... what to do, what to do.........? Aaaawwwww, maybe just one more game of Soitaire.......
posted by Jude at Saturday, September 18, 2004
5 Comments:
Great piece, Jude! I feel bad you were forced out of bed in the wee hours to write this entry, and I sympathize with you losing sleep while hubby was cuttin' the wood so loudly in dreamland. I've always slept alone ... well, except for brief periods of co-habitation with a few neanderthals in the 70's & 80's, lol. I think at least one of them was a snorer too as I recall, sheesh. Hey, I could be one too, who knows?
Anyway, I wish you a better night's sleep tonight. And, if you're rudely awakened again by another snoring storm, keep that pillow-snuffing temptation at bay and continue playing on-line Solitare, sista! lol
I shall try real hard to keep my hands to myself! LOL Thanks for the well wishes too, perhaps I'll actually get to STAY in bed tonight! Later, "S.S."!
I can totally sypmathize with you, Jude. My guy's a top-notch snorer too. I'm sure I make enough noise in my own right, but you know how men are. They gotta be louder and more noticeable than anyone else. Me and my sofa have been buddies more times than not.
Sorry you were sleepless...but this is one great write-up!
I don't know many women who don't have the same problem at night. Most do the sofa or another bed like you do. Me, I'd be kickin' him out and I'd be sleepin' in MY bed.... LOL That is, if I had the choice! Even friggin' ear plugs don't cut it anymore!!
I buy nose strips for him, and he begrudgingly wears them, but only the nights that I have to get up in the morning (for work or whatever) I am not making him wear them on my holidays to give him a break. Yes they DO help!!!
Except when he turns on his back...... but it's a whole damn sight better than without them!
Lors it's great to see ya here girl!!
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