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Friday, October 07, 2005

HAPPY THANKSGIVING, CANADA!

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I just love that picture, it cracks me up every time!

So......... not to whine overly much, but it just went from bad to worse here at home. The painters were supposed to be here to paint our walls tonight, but decided to show up at 3 p.m. or something instead, without telling us. I was at work, and hubby was out doing some running around before they were supposed to actually get here. So he gets home just after they were here, phones them, and they "are home now, so they don't want to come back until the morning". SATURDAY MORNING, PEOPLE. The one day that we could have attempted some sleeping in, or a nap. Uh huh. So I just don't know how much longer I am going to have all the furniture, and things emptied out of my china cabinet in every other room in my house. We have little "paths" to walk through everywhere, and nowhere to sit. Until they paint the fucking walls!

**D E E P B R E A T H S** ..............

Anyway on to other topics!! This is our Thanksgiving long weekend here, I know in the U.S. yours is in November. We won't be doing a turkey dinner or anything (seeing as I have furniture in front of my oven, LOL!!) but it will be nice to have that extra day to get stuff done. Anybody got any long weekend plans? Gobble, gobble!!

Here's a funny for you, thanks to my friend Tina!

This is probably the funniest date story ever, first date or not!!! We have all had bad dates...but this takes the cake. This just tells you how tough it is to be single these days. This was on the "Tonight Show" with Jay Leno.

Jay went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold...and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah. It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon.

They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte.

They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere!

Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her pee beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.

They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation.

Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.

Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and in need of some assistance!"

He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem.

Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down... or perhaps that should be "pants down."

........And you thought your first date was embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment . "This gives a whole new meaning to being 'pissed off.'



I wonder if this couple ever ended up getting married? LOL

Okay folks, have yourselves a fabulous weekend, stay safe, and take good care of each other. Until next time......

PEACE!
Love Jude

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